Tummy torture

As a direct result of making healthier lifestyle choices, I can proudly say that I have recently lost 80+ pounds. I am stronger and have a lot more energy. I decided to put my newly found energy to some good use and sign up for a 5K Marathon. The JP Morgan Chase Corporate Challenge took place downtown Chicago, there were over 23,000 participants, and I was one of them! I walk/jogged 4 miles about 3 times a week for months just to assure I was ready for the challenge. I will admit, it was not what I expected. By the time I met the 2 mile marker I was already very tired. By the time I completed the marathon my body hurt from the hair down. The next day I was very sore and felt like a group of people had beaten me. My dear friend Phoebe came to visit, and make sure I was as comfortable as possible. Phoebe did everything she could for me so I didn't have to move much. She was even nice enough to make me a nice healthy lunch, and cup of tea. I had a large assortment of relaxing tea choices for her to choose from, such as Sleepytime, Relax, Calm, etc. Phoebe knows I like my tea strong so she used two bags. I gratefully sipped my hot and sweet beverage. I couldn't quite place the taste but I have so much tea and I was so tired I didn't think too hard about it. We sat watching one of our favorite shows 'The Big Bang Theory' when all of the sudden there was a rumble in my tummy and an undeniable urge to get myself to the bathroom as quickly as possible. The pain I felt jumping up from the couch, running up the stairs, and into the bathroom was horrible. It seemed as if the stairs and hallway leading to the bathroom had doubled in length. The only thing worse than that, was 'Hurricain OMG!' rapidly growing in my tummy. Phoebe, surprised at my urgency, followed me upstairs and asked what was wrong. I described my predicament to her. I heard her walk downstairs, then a moment later she came back up. From the other side of the bathroom door my dear friend began apologizing. As it turns out dear sweet Phoebe accidentally made me a nice large and strong mug of Smooth Move - A Laxative Tea. I told her she was lucky I was in too much pain to chase her. I then informed her she may NEVER bring me another beverage ever again!  Needless to say, I missed the rest of 'Big Bang Theory.'